I’m hitting on all cylinders
My calls are going through
I’m in the zone
I’m not alone
I’m glad that I met you
I just hit the jackpot
Time to knock on wood
I’m in the groove
I made my move
And things are looking good
I’m taking on all challengers
My ship is in the bay
I’m on a roll
I reached my goal
Today’s my lucky day
My lucky streak keeps growing
I’m hotter than July
I wrote the book
I’m off the hook
You said that I’m your guy
by Richard W. Bray
Abelard and Héloise are dead
It doesn’t really matter what they said
Get your pretty face out of that book
Nature got a need for us to cook
Juliet and Romeo ain’t real
We can vanquish love like it’s a meal
Ravish and devour me till dawn
Live the life we got until it’s gone
Helena and Paris stole away
That’s what you and me should do today
Spirit me away in dark of night
Enchant me in delirious delight
Mark Antony and Cleo had their time
So we should make the most of yours and mine
Living blood is scorching through our veins
Let’s drink each other up just like Champagne
by Richard W. Bray
You know I hate to whine
But that man disrupts my mind
Told him fifty-seven times
That side is yours and this is mine
You can pray and you can plea
But that’s his personality
All your fussin’ and your cursin’
Won’t make him another person
He never hears when I complain
That man just lives to give me pain
He plays sports but he can’t aim
My man is just a walking stain
You can pray and you can plea
But that’s his personality
All your fussin’ and your cursin’
Won’t make him another person
What did I ever do
To deserve a man you you?
You’re such a lazy fool
I think your ass is made of glue
You can pray and you can plea
But that’s his personality
All your fussin’ and your cursin’
Won’t make him another person
by Richard W. Bray
Didn’t mean to disappoint you
When I put the bottle down
Hordes of losers livin’
Just to watch each other drown
Didn’t mean to disappoint you
When I put the bottle down
Now it makes y’all self-conscious
Just having me around
Didn’t mean to disappoint you
When I put the bottle down
I ain’t got a lot of interest
In the stinky side of town
Didn’t mean to disappoint you
When I put the bottle down
You can look inside a mirror
If you need another clown
Didn’t mean to disappoint you
When I put the bottle down
But I sure as hell ain’t sorry
For the daylight that I found
by Richard W. Bray
I need an angry noisy nutty girl
To thump my brain and wreck my world
A beasty batty nasty wife
To wrench my guts and ruin my life
I’ll find a gal who hates my mama
And cultivate some melodrama
I’ll never wonder why I chose
Someone to blame for all my woes
I need a crazy rowdy messy man
Drummer for a two-bit band
A needy stinky nasty boozer
A meth head and a hopeless loser
I’ll find a guy who hates my mama
And cultivate some melodrama
I’ll never wonder why I chose
Someone to blame for all my woes
by Richard W. Bray
You just complain, complain, complain
Like you’re the only one in pain
You can go to a movie
You can run a mile
You can come back and see me
When you’re ready to smile
You just complain, complain, complain
Like you’re the only one in pain
You can build a treehouse
You can dig a ditch
You can go to yoga
And breathe instead of bitch
You just complain, complain, complain
Like you’re the only one in pain
You can go to confession
You can find yourself a shrink
You can tell the bartender
Who sold you that drink
You just complain, complain, complain
Like you’re the only one in pain
You can hug your pillow
You can have a good cry
You can find someone to listen
But I’m not that guy
by Richard W. Bray
I feel my face smiling
All day long
And I can’t stop humming
An old love song
Flowers gonna bloom
The fiddler gets paid
Love is too dizzy
To be afraid
Every step I take
Is a leisurely stroll
And my head is all full
Of Nat King Cole
Flowers gonna bloom
The fiddler gets paid
Love is too dizzy
To be afraid
I’m probably crazy
In this melancholy world
Cuz I’m goofy in the head
For a brand new girl
Flowers gonna bloom
The fiddler gets paid
Love is too dizzy
To be afraid
by Richard W. Bray
You think I’ll stand in line
Until it’s my time
To spend all my money
On some wine and dine
You cancelled forty-seven dates
So what’d you expect?
I got a previous commitment
To my self-respect
You went to the restroom
But you never came back
Then I saw you at a club
Making out with Jack
I’d really love to see you
But last time I checked
I got a previous commitment
To my self-respect
You call in the morning
Needing a ride
When you were kicked to the curb
By another guy
I’d really love to help you
But last time I checked
I got a previous commitment
To my self-respect
by Richard W. Bray
Can you see them?
See right through them
They have no shield
No secrets to reveal
—Terry Hall, Our Lips Are Sealed
everybody knows
why I broke up with Ted
he’s so good at his job
and so lousy in bed
I probably told you
why I broke up with Ray
that silly mama’s boy
calls her six times a day
I guess you figured out
why I broke up with Bart
that hyperactive bowel
always makin him fart
it sure ain’t no secret
why I dumped Mr. White
his crazy sex fetish
and his sick appetite
I don’t have to tell you
why I kicked out that boozer
could never hold a job
such an adorable loser
the guys I go out with
they certainly suck
I’ll never figure out
my terrible luck
by Richard W. Bray
The past is never dead. It’s not even past.
—William Faulkner, Requiem for a Nun
Need to find a new job
A new city
A new wife
Gotta get away
From my dumpster fire life
There’s no new beginning
The past is never gone
There’s no place to hide
From everything you’ve done
Gonna dye my hair
Change the that way I dress
Start talking
With an accent
To escape this mess
There’s nowhere to go
The future isn’t new
It’s built on the past
And everything you do
I need a new name
And a new history
I can be anybody
As long as
It ain’t me
There’s no new beginning
The past is never gone
There’s no place to hide
From everything you’ve done
by Richard W. Bray
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