Never felt right
Never felt whole
Till I found a bottle
To parch my dusty soul
This dingy old bar
Is my urban oasis
Seventeen cocktails
Is my homeostasis
I do death and resurrection
On a regular basis
I came up in a stupid little
One-horse town
Booze is the friend
That never let me down
This dingy old bar
Is my urban oasis
Seventeen cocktails
Is my homeostasis
I do death and resurrection
On a regular basis
I’m anxious and ornery
Till I get a drink
Won’t quit until I wake up
In a pile of stink
This dingy old bar
Is my urban oasis
Seventeen cocktails
Is my homeostasis
I do death and resurrection
On a regular basis
Middle aged man in his underwear playing video games and drinking beer.
You don’t wanna work
You’ll never get a job
My mother was right
You’re a stupid lazy slob
I’m working three jobs
Just to get by
What am I doing
With such a lousy guy?
Disappoint me
Let me down
Incite my indignation
I will always
Keep you round
To focus my frustration
Playing your Nintendo
Like a stupid little kid
Jesus won’t you tell me
What I ever did
To deserve a drunkin fool
Spending everything I earn
I shoulda stayed in school
I guess I’ll never learn
Disappoint me
Let me down
Incite my indignation
I will always
Keep you round
To focus my frustration
‘Cause everybody’s gotta have somebody to look down on
Prove they can be better than at any time they please
Someone doin’ somethin’ dirty, decent folks can frown on
You can’t find nobody else, then help yourself to me
—Kris Kristofferson, Jesus Was a Capricorn
Been living here for fourteen years
I’m stuck inside a rut
I’m surrounded by losers
And piles and piles of smut
My wife took all my money
And left me in this hut
I can’t believe I fell
For that evil stupid slut
My rent just got doubled
And my salary was cut
Everywhere I turn
Another door is shut
You need a place to put your angry
When it wells inside your gut
You need a place to put your angry
When life kicks you in the nuts
Follow me. I’ll help you find
A way out of this pinch
We’ll find someone to blame
Or we’ll find someone to lynch
The way you treat your woman
Makes me wanna cry
You disgrace our gender
You’re a fraction of a guy
A million times you told her
She can’t do nothing right
You’re a tyrant and a terror
You’re so angry and uptight
Nothing she could try and do
Will ever be ok
Why you wanna be with
Someone you treat that way?
The way you treat your feller
Makes my gonads ache
Like he should live to serve you
For goodness gracious sake
Everything you say is
A complaint or a command
I could live a thousand years
And never understand
Why it makes you happy
To treat anyone that way
I’m just glad I won’t be ‘round
To watch your love decay
