Archive for the ‘denial’ Category

Hiding from the Hurt

May 13, 2014

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You can take a bunch of pills
Drink that whiskey by the cup
But your anguish and your ills
Will survive if you wake up

Can’t hide from the hurt
You gotta love it like a friend
It tells you who you are
It tells you what you gotta mend

You can pack up all that pain
You can shove it down deep
But the hurt will still remain
It’ll surface when you sleep

Can’t hide from the hurt
You gotta love it like a friend
It tells you who you are
It tells you what you gotta mend

You can fill up every day
You can work around the clock
You can play and play and play
You can talk and talk and talk

Can’t hide from the hurt
You gotta love it like a friend
It tells you who you are
It tells you what you gotta mend

by Richard W. Bray

Rain

May 28, 2013

rain

You can’t lie away the pain
But you can hide it for a while
Whitewash covers up a stain
Like a fresh coat of denial

You can’t drink away the pain
It’s such a sad and silly goal
And if you don’t go insane
You might just wash away your soul

You can’t laugh away the pain
By insisting it’s not real
When your dreams go down the drain
Don’t pretend that you don’t feel

I can’t love away your pain
But I can help you through the day
We’ll walk together in the rain
It’s never gonna go away

Richard W. Bray

Heroes (In Memory of Cheryl Rupp)

May 22, 2013

sunflower

It’s a rough and tumble universe
You’re gonna take some lumps
Now and then all of us
Are gonna get the grumps
It’s easy to be glum
In a world with so much bad
To celebrate misfortune
And paint the sky with sad

That’s why I admire
Folks who face the day
With a cheerful disposition
Whatever comes their way
You can be a hero
With a smile on your face
Attack this cruel, cruel world
With gentleness and grace

Richard W. Bray

The Hemingway Defense

July 7, 2012

William Faulkner

According to William Faulkner, it is permissible for an artist to engage in all manner of malfeasance and loutish behavior because “An artist is a creature driven by demons.”

The writer’s only responsibility is to his art. He will be completely ruthless if he is a good one. He has a dream. It anguishes him so much he must get rid of it. He has no peace until then. Everything goes by the board: honor, pride, decency, security, happiness, all, to get the book written. If a writer has to rob his mother, he will not hesitate; the “Ode on a Grecian Urn” is worth any number of old ladies. (h/t Ta-Nehisi Coates)

It is common for supermacho bibulous writers such as Faulkner, Kingsley Amis, Ernest Hemingway and Christopher Hitchens to confuse self-avoiding cowardice and self-destruction with courage and an intrepid dedication to art. Amis, for example, wrote entire books celebrating the wonders of alcohol. Hitchens thought that crawling into a bottle every day was something to boast about and he was dismissive of people who lack the requisite foolishness to become nicotine addicts. In the sick, sad world of Christopher Hitchens, teetotaling joggers are the real losers.

Stephen King, a man who knows a thing or two about both writing and substance abuse, has a name for the hyper-masculine variety of denial celebrated by various dipsomaniacal American authors: The Hemingway Defense.

as a writer, I am a very sensitive fellow, but I am also a man, and real men don’t give into their sensitivities. Only SISSY-men do that. Therefore I drink. How else can I face the existential horror of it all and continue to work? Besides, come on, I can handle it. A real man always can.*

King explicitly rejects all such poppycock. He argues that “[t]he idea that creative endeavor and mind-altering substances are entwined is one of the great pop-intellectual myths of our time.”

Unlike writers such as Faulkner who lack the necessary self-awareness to confront their “demons,” when given the choice, Stephen King wisely selected his health and his family over the bottle. Thus he has no use in mythologizing the inebriated scribbler.

Substance abusing writers are just substance abusers—common garden-variety drunks and druggies, in other words. Any claims that the drugs and alcohol are necessary to dull a finer sensibility are just the usual self-serving bullshit. I’ve heard alcoholic snowplow drivers make the same claim, that they drink to still the demons.

Faulkner asserts that it is perfectly natural and wholly acceptable for a writer to be a scoundrel because a true artist “is completely amoral in that he will rob, borrow, beg, or steal from anybody and everybody to get the work done.”

Sadly, people who think like Faulkner have gotten existence precisely backwards. As King notes, “Life isn’t a support system for art. It’s the other way around.”

William Faulkner notwithstanding, no art is essential to humanity, and no poem, not even one as lovely as “Ode on a Grecian Urn,” is worth the well-being of a single old lady. Humanity will grope along with or without any particular work of art, and Earth will continue to abide long after we’re gone no matter what we do. It is expressly because everything we do is ephemeral that the artist’s humanity is of far greater value than anything he could possibly create.

Perhaps it is a longing for a false sense of immortality that leads people to engage in such diseased thinking. But it’s important to remember that although Hamlet will continue to live on for as long as humanity is extant, William Shakespeare is just as dead as the fellow buried next to him. As Groucho Marx pithily noted: “What has posterity ever done for me.”

Only love conquers death.

*All Stephen King quotations are from his marvelous memoir On Writing

by Richard W. Bray

Tyrant

September 1, 2011

bully

Tyrant

I’m the boss, so listen you
Cuz I’m the one on top
If the sunshine makes me blue
Then you must make it stop

Get up, sit down
Do everything I say
Come here, go there
Now please just go away

Guys like you need guys like me
To keep y’all on track
You’re competent and diligent
It’s leadership you lack

Get up, sit down
Do everything I say
Come here, go there
Now please just go away

I am here to govern you
That’s how life turned out
You must cry when I am blue
And listen when I shout

Get up, sit down
Do everything I say
Come here, go there
Now please just go away

You don’t need to thank me
For long hours and paltry pay
Adversity builds character
You’ll understand some day

Get up, sit down
Do everything I say
Come here, go there
Now please just go away

by Richard W. Bray

Other People’s Problems

May 31, 2011

Other People’s Problems


Ever’body got a gift
And I was born to see
Other people’s problems
It’s my spesh-ee-al-i-tee
I’m just here to help them
Be the best they’ll ever be
Got so much time to do it
Cuz there’s nothing wrong with me

My daddy is a sweetheart
But he likes to take a swig
He lives to serve his country
When he ain’t in the brig
And you know I love my mama
Despite everywhere she been
And all my friends and neighbors
Are such paragons of sin:

Sarah is a diva,
Lester is a drunk
Harold is a pervert,
And a weasel and a punk
They tell me “mind your business”
But I know it’s bunk
They pretend that they’re all rosy
When they really smell like skunk

Ever’body got a gift
And I was born to see
Other people’s problems
It’s my spesh-ee-al-i-tee
An Egyptian river is
Where I ought to be
Thinking about you
Replaces thinking about me

by Richard W. Bray

Tonight in Every Bar

February 22, 2011

Tonight
In every bar
Drunken alcoholics speak
Of friends who really have
A drinking problem.

by Richard W. Bray