Some Thoughts on Streetball

December 28, 2011

So it is in life—from sun, to moon, to earth, to night, to day, to you getting up in the morning and going out to play a game of ball. All the rhythms of life are in some way related, one to another.

The First Book of Rhythm by Langston Hughes

So you know, that you’re over the hill
When your mind makes a promise that your body can’t fill

Old Folks Boogie by Little Feat

I love to drive past Brea Junior High School on Lambert Road on warm nights when guys are playing basketball under the lights even though I had to quit over a decade ago. I played regularly in the same pickup game for over twenty years (roughly 1980-2000) until my body said, “No mas.” At some point we all must accept that the beat goes on without us.

On Saturdays and Sundays we would meet on the dirty asphalt: Kenny, Mitch, Oscar, Bob, Tony, Carl, Dave, Robert, Michell, Regan, Jeff, Rob, Brian, Don, Andy, Steve, me and whoever else decided to show. Some showed up sporadically; others were there every Saturday and Sunday. Year round unless it was raining, we almost always had enough guys to play five on five full court basketball. Sometimes so many guys showed up that when you lost you’d have to watch three or four games before you could play again.

Streetball has no constitution, but there are rules which vary somewhat from court to court. Two nearly universal rules make it possible for a guy to show up and play almost anywhere.

(Warning: Although I’ve shown up by myself and played at ballcourts in various locals without serious incident, it is always advisable to bring backup when playing with guys you don’t know. And some games should probably be avoided outright. I stopped playing at a particular court in Pomona when a buddy told me that disputes there sometimes involved firearms.)

Rule One: Players call their own fouls and all calls are respected. Play stops any time a player yells “foul,” and his team gets the ball back without any arguing or complaining–well, that’s how it works in theory. But if someone abuses this rule by calling a foul every time he misses a layup, that player will eventually face a barrage of verbal reprimands, sometimes from his own teammates. This is how the game regulates itself.

Rule Two:
The winning team keeps playing while the losers go to the back of the line. At our court next game always went to the five guys who had been waiting the longest, which is a good way to maintain tranquility and keep the games flowing. (At many streetball venues, players are able to call “next” and then choose whomever they want to be on their team–for example, one player might call next and then wait to choose the best players from the team that just lost, ignoring guys who have been waiting for several games.)

Streetball is an institution which functions as a building block of our civil society. Each week we chose to freely associate with one another in order to exercise our appetites for conflict, competition, and fellowship. All sorts of good and bad things can happen when grown men attempt to maintain comity and civility while fiercely chasing a round little ball. Over the years there was often much shouting and bluster, but we were usually able to settle disputes without assaulting one another.


I don’t want to frighten any of my younger readers, but in the age before smartphones, human beings who desired fellowship actually had to talk to the people around them
. And that’s what we did between games, we talked about everything. Sports. Life. The weather. We even talked about the onomatopoetic ramifications of Chick Hearn’s expression, “in-n-out heart BUH-RAKE.” That’s why I miss the guys as much as I miss the game.

Drivers, teachers, lawyers, students, contractors, forklift operators, electricians, surgeons, linemen, entrepreneurs, computer programmers, waiters, painters, carpenters, college professors, air conditioner repairmen. I miss the guys.

by Richard W. Bray

Max y Arroz Picoso (by richard)

December 22, 2011

Ingredients:

1 400 gram can of Zanahorias en Escabeche (Sliced Pickled Carrots with Jalapenos)
1 1/2 cups white rice (or brown rice if that’s what you’re into)
3 cups chicken broth
1 chopped bell pepper (or half a stalk chopped celery)
2 teaspoons olive oil

Directions:
Combine rice, vegetables and broth. Add oil and salt and pepper to taste. Bring to a boil and reduce to simmer until liquid disappears (approximately 20 minutes).

Thinking v. Feeling

December 17, 2011

Theodore_Roethke_as_an_infant,_Saginaw,_Michigan,_ca_1909_(PORTRAITS_699)

Thinking v. Feeling

Poet said We think by feeling
A thought that echoes Hume
No logic-minded being
Would genuflect at tombs

We feel therefore we think
Is what they’re finding out
This unappealing link
Is Descartes turned inside out

With a touch of intervention
From our modern frontal lobe
My breed maintains ascension
On our lovely little globe

Toughest on the block
With more appetite than smarts
Condemned to rule this rock
For the cravings of the heart

by Richard W. Bray

Rough Draft Peer Review WorkSheet and an Amusing Teacher Story

December 9, 2011

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I have students bring two copies of their rough drafts. While the students are doing their peer reviews, I scan the other copy, looking at the structure of the essays rather than proofreading them. The students are free to proofread one another’s essays.

Directions

1. Turn in one copy of paper to instructor.
2. Take two Peer Review Worksheets.
3. Get into groups of 3-4 Students.
4. Take turns reading papers ALOUD to group.
5. Pass paper clockwise (or counterclockwise if you’re feeling rebellious).
6. Silently read another student’s paper and fill out worksheet.
7. Repeat steps 5 & 6.

Rough Draft Peer Review Sheet

Author: __________________________________________________

Reader:__________________________________________________

Paper Title:_______________________________________________

This paper is ______pages long (excluding Works Cited page)

This paper includes a Works Cited page in MLA format: Yes No

Thesis statement is in paragraph # _____

Copy thesis statement verbatim.

Two enlightening quotations from sources that the author utilized are:

and

Two notable sentences that the author composed are:

and

What is the paper’s strongest feature?

An Amusing Teacher Story

During a discussion about ESP, a student informed the class that he possessed a “sixth scent.” Miraculously, I resisted the temptation to say, “You’re telling me, buddy.” (Life rarely provides such a perfect straight line.)

by Richard W. Bray

Dishes

December 2, 2011

Dirty_dishes

Dishes


Are the dishes in the dishwasher clean?
Did you forget to turn on the machine?
Are the dishes in the dishwasher clean?
Why are they foul and obscene?
Are the dishes in the dishwasher clean?
They s lack all luster and sheen.
Are the dishes in the dishwasher clean?
Why are they yucky moldy green?
Are the dishes in the dishwasher clean?
You look confused; don’t you know what I mean?
Are the dishes in the dishwasher clean?

by Richard W. Bray

On Redundancy, Oxymora, and Grammatical Correctness

November 19, 2011

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It would be redundant to say that Dave was “completely devastated” when his hamster died because there cannot be degrees of devastation. I can be extremely scared by radio reports of zombies in my neighborhood, but it would be inexact to say that I am extremely terrified. Conversely, it would be oxymoronic* to declare that Dave was only “slightly devastated” by the news of his hamster’s untimely demise.

For the poet (by which I also of course mean the novelist) the phrases completely devastated and slightly devastated have all sorts of wonderful possibilities. However, writers seeking precision with their words (students enrolled in a Freshman Composition class, for example) should avoid such phrases.

* George Carlin has helpful lists of redundancies and oxymora in his book Braindroppings

Evaluation

State whether the highlighted portions of the following sentences are redundant, oxymoronic, or grammatically acceptable.

1. I was a tad heartbroken when my wife left me for my younger brother.

2. My aunt is a little bit pregnant.

3. Dresden was totally incinerated by the Allied bombing.

4. Pizza is extremely overrated.

5. My cat was completely dead after the accident.

6. Gertrude was a little bit exhausted after studying six straight hours for her English exam.

7. Osvaldo was completely miserable after he lost the tiddlywinks tournament.

8. The traffic around here is somewhat slow after jai alai matches.

9. Pham was extremely furious when I told her the results from Dancing with the Stars.

10. Ted overdosed slightly on pain medication.

by Richard W. Bray

Lies

November 6, 2011

Lies


The sky is green
The sea is pink
Babies don’t cry
And shit don’t stink

Money is sacred
People are not
What’s important
Is what you got

War is good
Bombs are smart
Might makes right
Killing is art

Anarchy is freedom
Lies are true
God loves us
More’n He loves you

Theft is liberation
Democracy, sublime
Self-defense is terror
Resistance is a crime

The sky is green
The sea is pink
Babies don’t cry
And shit don’t stink

by Richard W. Bray

Chocolate Chip Pumpkin Bread and Tivo (by Mia)

October 28, 2011

Tivo

Chocolate Chip Pumpkin Bread

Ingredients

* 1 cup sugar
* 1 cup canned pumpkin
* 1/4 cup unsweetened applesauce
* 1/4 cup fat free vanilla yogurt
* 2 large egg whites
* 1 1/2 cups all purpose flour
* 1 tsp ground cinnamon
* 3/4 tsp salt
* 1/2 tsp baking soda
* 1/2 cup semisweet chocolate chips
* cooking spray


Preparation

* Preheat oven to 350 degrees.

* Combine first 5 ingredients in a large bowl, and stir well. In a medium bowl, combine flour, cinnamon, salt, and baking soda. Add flour mixture to pumpkin mixture, stirring just until moist. Stir in chocolate chips.

* Spoon batter into a loaf pan coated with cooking spray. Bake for 45-50 minutes or until a wooden pick inserted in the center comes out clean. Cool 10 minutes in pan, then remove. Cool completely on wire rack. Makes 16 slices.

**To make it even healthier, try Splenda instead of sugar! I didn’t want to try it for the first time making it, but the next time I make it I’m going to try this to see how it compares!

Devoid

October 22, 2011

A face devoid of love or grace,
A hateful, hard, successful face,

Devoid

I’ve studied all one needs to know ‘bout every little thing
I’ve scoured the biographies of philosophes and kings
I’ve meditated countless hours on all that I have learned
And I’ve concluded modestly that clearly I have earned
The right to state objectively that all I would proclaim
Is exactly what should be, and wouldn’t it be a shame
If Lilliputian intellects and putrid second-raters
Or lily-livered losers and unmanly imitators
Would dare to think that they possess grit and gut and gall
To interrupt my project for the benefit of all?

Undermined by cowards and their miniscule bereavements
Who could not comprehend the scope of my achievement
Like pesky little gnats, they hindered my attention
Allowing mediocrities to cancel my ascension
These trifling mental midgets who dared to halt my plans
Don’t deserve to share the planet with a real fighting man
They can analyze the metrics until the end of time
And never comprehend the dimensions of their crime
When assessing this fiasco, please do not involve me
For I have every confidence that history will absolve me

by Richard W. Bray

The Road

October 15, 2011

Nemrut_Walk_uphill_in_2006_1389

The Road

road runs uphill
every day
you go out there
every day
logging miles to earn your meals

road runs uphill
every day
if you don’t struggle
every day
you’re probably spinning wheels

road runs uphill
every day
a tilted treadmill
all the way
washing clothes and scraping grills

road runs uphill
every day
and if you stop
to look away
you might end up taking a spill

road runs uphill
every day
so dance your song
all the way
and get your fill before you pay the bill

by Richard W. Bray