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The House of the Dead

Terrence, Timmy, Becky and Fred
Went to visit The House of the Dead
Terrence was frightened but Becky said,
“C’mon guys, it’s just an old shed”
Timmy stammered, “Did you hear about Ned?
He disappeared the night he was wed.
His widow claims that although he fled
Spirits dragged him back to the House of the Dead”

Becky said, “Timmy, you’re just a scardy cat.
Ned went back to pick up his hat.”
“I heard,” said Fred “That he found his hat
But lost his life. How about that?”
“You know,” Said Terrence, “I think we should scat
Cuz’ I just saw a big black cat.”
Then Tommy bumped into a great big bat
And screamed for his mommy who had warned him that

The House of the Dead was no place to play
And prudent people knew to stay away
But Becky was fearless on that fateful day.
She continued down the spooky walkway
Terrence and Timmy turned and ran away
But Fred got up the nerve to say,
“Now Becky you know I’d rather not stay
But I couldn’t just leave you alone that way.”

Becky said, “Terrence, do what you will
I’m not about to miss out on a thrill.”
Terrence shrugged off a great big chill
And followed her up the haunted hill
The two trekked on by force of will
And boldly ignored with majestic skill
The squeals and screeches, wicked and shrill
Made by spirits that maim and kill

After they opened the creaking door
She grabbed his arm and they walked ‘cross the floor
Then they saw what they were looking for
Grisly guts and gruesome gore
And a hideous specter which they could not ignore
Appeared behind them and locked the door
He said, “Have a seat, I do implore
And I’ll tell you a story about the woman I adore

Her name is Rebecca, just like you
She died in Seventeen Seventy-Two
When a man named Oliver Sutton Drew
Shot her and her lover, Winthrop Larue
Oliver died a young man too
He was sent to the gallows for the people he slew
Now the three of us have nothing to do
But frighten poor young fools like you.”

Two bloody bodies appeared next to Fred
Their faces filled with terror and dread
Becky grabbed a bar made of lead
And threw it through the window next to the bed
As one of the ghosts removed its head
They tried to climb out then dove instead
They followed their trail back where it led
And never returned to The House of the Dead

by Richard W. Bray

A Monster’s Worst Nightmare

There was a dragon in my room
I slew him with a fork and spoon
And cooked it on my brand new grill
My mom and dad couldn’t get their fill

A vampire tried to bite my neck
I turned and said, “Hey, what the heck?”
I grabbed a pencil from my desk
And shoved it deep into his chest

While walking on a moonlit night
A werewolf tried to pick a fight
But I showed him my silver knife
And he went running for his life

A haunted house is where I play
And when a ghost gets in my way
One curse and three Latin chants
Scares him right out of his pants

Frankenstein thinks he’s so vicious
And I’ll admit he is pernicious
But he’s so easy to short-circuit
If you know just how to work it

The loch-Ness monster got in my tub
When it was time to rub-dub-dub
I lured him like all other fishes
My family said he was delicious

I’m not a guy who likes to boast
But mess with me and you are toast
Warning monsters: If you see me
I suggest you let me be

by Richard W. Bray

Sunny Street School

At Sunny Street School in Room Seventeen
Is the scariest teacher this world’s ever seen
So you better not mess with little Miss Green
She’s downright sadistic, not merely mean

She’s a hideous monster with a teaching degree
And she’s sure to scare you the way she scared me
When she threatened to feed me to her pet killer bees
When all I had done was ask to go pee

Did you hear about Steven who lives up the street?
He wouldn’t stand straight so she cut off his feet
And poor Patty Proctor was incurably sweet
Miss Green sent her swimming in a block of concrete

Young Horace forgot his homework one day
And we all knew that he would have to pay
When all the other kids were sent out to play
Horace was crated and shipped to Bombay

If you get on this woman’s bad side
You could be sent on a very long ride
Or end up looking like Frankenstein’s bride
She’s wicked and weird, it can’t be denied

by Richard W. Bray