I really like your auto
And the things it can do
We had one just like it
Back in 1962
My car does the dishes
Cooks my eggs and cuts my hair
It even does my taxes
And tells me what to wear
I really like your children
They’re not afraid to fail
They can even dress themselves
And they’ve never been in jail
My daughter goes to Harvard
Can you believe she’s only four?
Her brother just cured cancer
And he put an end to war
I really like your clothing
It’s so 1982
Your Member’s Only jacket
Is the perfect look for you
Everything I wear
Is from Paris or Milan
If the designer isn’t famous
I won’t even try it on
I really like your courage
You’re not afraid to drink
Nasty rustic water
Coming from your kitchen sink
Pure and pristine water
From a Himalayan spring
The Dalai Lama blessed it
It’s the only thing I drink
You’re my inspiration
You’re so gallant and carefree
You have the will to go on living
And you’re not even me
by Richard W. Bray